A Top the Highest Hill

 

“How do you pick up the threads of an old life? How do you go on, when in your heart you begin to understand there is no going back. There are some things that time cannot mend. Some hurts that go too deep... that have taken hold.”
– JRR Tolkien

 

 

There are NO mistakes.  There are challenges, there are triumphants, there are lessons.  We live to learn and overcome these challenges.  We are destined to always become better, to move forward, and progress.  With each passing day there are always new mountains to climb, but atop each summit is a new reward.

Life... what a puzzling thing; not the bilogical concept, as science does so well at explaining such fuctions but its purpose.  And to this purpose... are we fulfilling it?  Is our being making this world a better or different place?  We all change the world even if to a small degree, there is purpose to each one of us we are destined to be great if we in fact choose to do so.

“Frodo: I wish the ring had never come to me. I wish none of this had happened.

Gandalf: So do all who live to see such times, but that is not for them to decide.

All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.”

Initiative... take pride in who you are and always strive to become more.  We are what we make ourselves to be; we determine the greatness we bestow on this earth.  The time is now to put one step in front of the other and achieve what it is we were set out to become... "To thine own self be true."

I gather my pack and fasten the straps, I take a large gulp of water, close the car door and prepare for what lies ahead.  A few steps forward and we're headed on our way; about to climb atop the highest point east of the Rocky Mountains.  This is no ordinary hike as at the top of this summit is not only an amazing panoramic view but also an incredibly beautiful stone structure that is stoic in its presence. 

We travel onward.  I pace behind someone who travels much quicker than I but with each huff and puff I keep up as best as I can.  With each twist and turn along the trail I learn more about myself, I find that I am a much stronger person than I had thought.  I am able to move past trials, conflict, and feelings and realize my true potential.  I am not defined by how others feel about me and perceive me to be, nor what society sizes you up to be; but instead was starting to acknowledge the fact that I have immense potential but for so long have neglected to strive for more.

Comfort and stability are ideas that I have become so infatuated with for so long.  No guessing, no complexity, simply put... predictability.  But where is the fun in that?  Where's the adventure?  I can't live in the 'what ifs' or 'could have beens' I need to rely on the 'nows' the 'greater goods.' 

Hitting the trail and pondering such things amongst the pines makes things easier to sort out.  The fresh air, the dirt beneath my feet created the perfect atmosphere for thinking.  Alas after much thinking I realize that I simply do too much thinking...

"Simplicity. Simplicity, Simplicity" - Henry David Thoreau

 

What is wrong with just letting life happen...  As the hike neared the top I was able to just relax, to come to peace, and just not, for the lack of a better phrase, give a shit.  But FINALLY I had reached the top of the hill that I had so long wanted to climb.  There I was, I had accomplished something I had set out to do and it felt great and had many rewards such as spectacular views that lie on the horizons.  Smokey as the skies were one could still enjoy the ambiance of the place.  It had taken almost two years but another check on the list and another self discovery....  but dear lord, 2 years!

TWO YEARS... can you believe it?!?!  Two crazy years; I can hardly believe it myself.  It was November 6th, 2010 that I packed my bags. left Montana, and headed out to South Dakota.  The best decision or the worst decision I will never know, but the right decision; absolutley!  My life has completley changed in every aspect.  I left Montana knowing exactly where my life was going and none of those things have nor will happen.

Darwinism at its best… ‘It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent that survives. It is the one that is most adaptable to change.

This hasn’t been the easiest journey in fact you might say it’s been completely life changing. I have a new ‘home,’ new friends, new job, even a slightly different personality and outlook on life. But I suppose all these things stem from just growing older. Too often I toss and turn at night worrying about what’s to be, instead I should focus my attention on what is and live in the moment. It’s hard not to wonder such things though especially when you are faced with making decisions everyday of your life. 

Like any journey in my life I have embarked on I have met incredible people, discovered more about this crazy planet, had my heart broken, seen new and amazing places, and learned more about the person I am. Here's to the last two years and here's to the future.  We shall see what life holds for me... Until next time:

“All that is gold does not glitter,
Not all those who wander are lost;
The old that is strong does not wither,
Deep roots are not reached by the frost.

From the ashes a fire shall be woken,
A light from the shadows shall spring;
Renewed shall be blade that was broken,
The crownless again shall be king.”
― J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring